The Frankenbaby Chronicles

Two girls, three cats, some frozen sperm, a doctor's office, and a big dream.

Thursday, April 12, 2007

So we are in the 3rd Trimester now...

Oh my god!

I am so very very excited and scared witless about the baby who will be here in about 11 0r so weeks!

I am continuing my reading about expectant Dads and felt more connection to what I am reading about in this book that has been very much recommended by people - Confessions of the Other Mother: Non-Biological Lesbian Moms Tell All.

I bought it from Amazon and only read a little bit - but I already relate and feel understanding and commiseration of feelings! Heh... I am totally acting out my inner issues with the whole over protectiveness and need to *fix* and *paint* and *build* and use tools and ladders!;) Okay I already wanted to do those things, but I definitely feel an unexpected push to do those things more.

And I never expected to see myself, big butch non dress wearing no make up me, picking our little girly dresses! OMG!!!!

But there I am, picking out cute little dresses- though not as frilly as those Jude picks out;).

I am super excited and scared and wonderfully amazed at everything and so very much in love with Jude and our little girl.

We met with our Doula last night and she had asked us some questions and had a questionnaire of sorts about how we might rate the needs we will have and "Get Partner Food/Drinks" was one of the options and I was like - "huh? Why would I want food or drinks?" Part of this is having no idea about what we are really in store for and part of it is being totally in the whole my focus will not stray to things like food or drinks! No way.

So yeah - I didn't have any questions either....but I am looking forward to reading the books Jude and I ordered - recommended reading for what to expect about the birthing process. And I am also looking forward to the class and also a little scared - but only a little:)


Blogger Kathryn - partner of Donna said...

I also bought "Confessions of the Other Mother: Non-Biological Lesbian Moms Tell All" - Great minds think alaike eh?!?!

5:03 AM  
Blogger Kathryn - partner of Donna said...

That was meant to read "a like"!!!

Whoops!!! ;0) x

5:04 AM  
Blogger Mermaidgrrrl said...

I've got a question for you - my partner is also a gorgeous lovely butch whom I adore beyond measure. When we consider the idea that we may be having a girl she tends to go ga-ga over the girly baby frocks too. Of course she is horrified at the idea that she was EVER dressed in those clothes and was quite funny and squirming with embarrassment at her mums place the other day when her mum was pulling out the little pink dresses she had worn! So here's my question - do you look at the non-feminine and even butch kinds of clothes for a girl baby too? Or automatically default to the feminine ideas for your baby? I only ask because my partner seems to default to the feminine, whilst I (with my adoration of butch girls) am very open-minded about choosing quite boyish outfits for girl children as well as the feminine ones. It seems funny to me that when I've laid out an outfit for the baby that's unisexed my partner always asks "But what if it's a girl?" but this seems to be quite a universal thing and I'm the odd one here! So what do you think Jennifer? I'd love to hear your opinion about this stuff!
PS - sorry this is quite a late comment after the post. I don't have this blog on my bloglines, only the other one.

4:36 AM  
Blogger Jennifer said...

Heh - I am not sure if I am the best person to answer this...

While I do think little dresses for the most part are super cute - I also have picked out - and sometimes been rejected and sometimes been accepted - unisex and even "boy" clothes.

I just think baby clothes are cute. Before we knew we were having a girl I picked out a couple of "boyish" outfits and a blue polo! Jude asked me what I would do if we had a girl and I just blinked confused....of course we would dress our baby girl in these clothes too!

I think Jude hit the nail on the head for a lot of women, butch or otherwise....

Clothes really do play a big part with which you perceive your baby or others perceive your baby. I think baby girl and pick out dresses and cutesie things....and a couple of tomboy stuff too;)

But when someone sees our baby in that blue polo or the red striped onesie they are going to immediately think "boy."

It's very hard to even find unisex stuff too without ending up with a closet of green and yellow only. And most blue stuff has trucks or cars on it and vice versa....

So, in the highly delineated binary system of baby gender in our commercial society today - I am no longer surprised to see butch women picking out little dresses for our baby girls because we have been trained since birth that pink means baby girl and light blue means baby boy. It's a hard habit to break for someone else - it's easier for ourselves.

Hope that helps! :)

8:24 AM  

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